Safe,
sane, and consensual are the hallmarks of any Leather
activity. Today we most often think of safe sex as taking
precautions against the spread of AIDS, and well we should.
But there are a lot of other things of which we need to
be mindful.
Happily,
Leather play can be both safe and fun. With just a slight
amount of effort, we can fulfill all sorts of fantasies
without harm. The key, of course, lies in having the right
information, taking precautions, and using common sense.
In the final analysis, you are responsible for your health
and safety. Please act accordingly.
I
will not pontificate as to what is safe activity between
two consenting adults. I trust that you are adults and
will act in a responsible manner.
Acting
in a responsible means that you are informed. As in a
court of Law, ignorance is no excuse. Face the facts as
outlined by your physician and follow them. We've heard
it before but it bears repeating: Don't allow another's
blood or semen to come into contact with any open membrane
in your body, ie.: mouth, rectum, vagina, eyes, cut, or
wound.
I'm
sure there are those out there who hate rubbers (condoms)
as much as I do, but the inconvenience is well worth the
reward. Sex is wonderful, but as the posters and ads say,
"It's not worth dying for."
Happily,
HIV is a lot less virile than many think. Don't make it
an excuse to cut yourself off (so to speak) from the pleasures
your body can give and receive from others. With the right
information you can learn how to enjoy sex and stay healthy.
There are many sexually active men and women who are still
free of the AIDS virus. They stay that way by playing
safely. HIV doesn't need spell the end of sex, only the
end of unsafe sex!
But
there are risks other than HIV. Several other STDs are
in fact easier to catch. Though they may not be as deadly,
they ought to be avoided.
Leather
activity need not be dangerous. In fact, many Leather
activities offer a high degree of erotic stimulation without
any risk of disease. There is no transfer of body fluids
in healthy tit work, or cock and ball torture. Understanding
and adhering to the need for cleanliness in one's toys
(dildoes, whips, paddles, clamps, etc.) opens up a wide
variety of safe activities. A good spanking with a clean
clothes brush won't give you the clap...
But
there are other guidelines the CDC doesn't list. Tops
and bottoms alike need to take responsibility for their
safety and the safety of their partner. In any scene the
top needs to to insure that the bottom's skin isn't broken
with welts or cuts, that his or her circulation isn't
impeded by ropes or restraints. Check frequently that
extremities (hands and feet) don't get cold or fall asleep.
And
being aware isn't only the top's responsibility. Bottoms
ought not to be so "macho" as to endure health
threatening domination. Don't be afraid to ask your top
to stop. After all, they can't feel the effects as well
as you can.
Often
Leather partners will choose a "safe word" for
the bottom to signal the top that there is some kind of
danger or that the bottom's limits are being unwisely
exceeded. There is no disgrace in asking for the scene
to stop when one's health is endangered. Submitting oneself
to danger is not "being a good slave", it is
stupid.
In
that regard, care should be taken with the use of hand
cuffs as they are apt to cut off circulation. Tie those
bottoms up well, but carefully. Put them in positions
that they can maintain and use padded restraints.
Equipment
ought to be clean and should never be shared in a scene.
Make it strictly a "BYO" affair. Chlorine bleach
(diluted in water in a one to ten solution) does wonders
on dildoes. Soap and water never hurt anyone --- at least
that's what my mom taught me.
Since
I'm in a "do and don't" kind of mood, use lubricants
with non-oxynol-9. If there is any amount of anal play,
be sure your fingernails are well trimmed and wear latex
gloves. They can be bought a box of 100 for under ten
dollars. Use them once and throw them away. Remember:
"No glove, no love".
If
the taste of latex leaves something to be desired, use
flavored lubricant and load on the non-oxynol-9 after
the oral play and before insertion. You can also play
well with chocolate, maple syrup, and whipped cream. But
whip the cream in the kitchen with a beater, not a leather
cat of nine tails!
Avail
yourself of good information. Ask your physician, read
any of the many guides to safe sex. Attend informational
meetings put on by any of the Leather clubs or health
organizations. The only stupid question is the one that
isn't asked. After all, it's your health and that of your
partners.
Play
all you want, but do it safely. As the wonderful nurse
at Howard Brown told me after my last check up: "Honey,
I don't know what you're doing, but keep on doing it."
Little did she know that I was just waiting for permission!!!
Copyright
2000 by Jack Rinella. This material may not be copied in
any manner. For permission to reproduce this essay, contact
mrjackr@leathermail.com
Return
to Main Page